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  1. #1
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    17 year old disordered eating

    Basically dont feel like writing a ton, but i will share some. So I have lost like 40lbs and now I am 174 at 5'9. I am eating 1650 calories now and am not losing much weight. I just wanna be lean for once in my life and be like 155.

    I stopped going out w friends and doing anything social on the weekends so i can consistently track my cals. I hate that. I weight all my food and hate eating anything that is unweighed. I have had moments where I say no to plans and dont go places just so that i dont have to eat out.

    Also i currently deal w binging and binge very bad on vacations and holidays. On weekends i fear that i will end up binging like 6k calories and am always thinking about food.

    I am facing 2 problems that contradict each other: I wanna like my body and lose more bf, but I also want to be like a normal highschooler and eat normally like my friends. I just wanna be able to be happy and i feel that i may have some sort of ed.
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  2. #2
    OCB Pro smokinal's Avatar
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    I don't know if I have any earthshattering advice for you bud. But I do want to say that there are a lot of good, knowledgeable people on here who will help you and listen to you; so keep the lines of communication open here.

    ---Can you talk to your parents about this? School councelor?
    ---Are you weight trainig? Cardio? What's your activity level?

    You've made great progress so far! Be proud of that and keep your chin up.
    And try to do more with your friends. They're trying to get you out and social. Tucking yourself into a corner isn't going to help your mental state. Just be cautious of what you eat if that makes you feel better while you're out. On a day where you know you'll be going out later, just adjust your intake early in the day to "save room" for calories later.
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  3. #3
    Common sense/moderation. gbullock32's Avatar
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    Been there, it's no fun, knowing you need to stop but not being able to. You're young, in the prime of growth years; just eat, stop tracking, stick to mainly whole foods but keep in mind a burger, pizza, tacos, ect are all still 'good' food. They are made of carbs. protein, and fat like anything else. Are your friends all fat? Likely not, they just eat to satiation and use moderation with 'junk' foods, a little wont hurt, and incorporating some can help with cravings and prevent binges. Starving yourself is never the answer.

    Feel free to PM me if you want more personal advice, always happy to help. In my signature (under this post) I have a long thread of how I went through this too, long read but more thorough explanation of what I did.
    Short cuts to success are often paved with lies.
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  4. #4
    Yells at clouds BS57's Avatar
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    In your 2019 post:
    Originally Posted by numbaoneman View Post
    I’m 14 years old and 5’7. I am around 137 lbs and I want to lose fat so I have a better appearance and feel more confident. However I’m not sure if I should be calorie counting or not because it makes me pretty miserable. All of my friends eat pizza, soda, Oreos etc. and don’t care at all about what they eat. I pack my own lunches and make sure all the foods I eat are whole and healthy. I just want to get to the point where I can lose fat without tracking calories. My parents tell me I’m perfect and I don’t need to lose fat but they just say that because they’re my parents. They don’t want me to lose any more weight or track calories. They just want me to be a normal teenager and eat freely without caring. I also wish I could eat freely without caring but I just can’t. My relationship with food has become a lot worse over the past year I and I just want to not worry about what I eat. So is there a way I can lose fat and not worry about what I eat? (Sorry this is long)
    Now you claim you want to be "155 for once in your life"?

    And stating you've now lost 40 lbs, that would have put you at 214.

    What sort of exercise/activities are you doing?
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  5. #5
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Im trying to reply back to you all but i have like 0 knowledge on how to work this website
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  6. #6
    Common sense/moderation. gbullock32's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by numbaoneman View Post
    Im trying to reply back to you all but i have like 0 knowledge on how to work this website
    To reply to a post click 'reply' at the bottom right of the post, to send a direct message click the users name and then 'Private Message'.
    Short cuts to success are often paved with lies.
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  7. #7
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by gbullock32 View Post
    To reply to a post click 'reply' at the bottom right of the post, to send a direct message click the users name and then 'Private Message'.


    Update: nothing has gotten better. Got a little leaner but summer came and i gained more fat. have never struggled more. Leaving for college in 10 days at an all time low
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  8. #8
    Moderator SuffolkPunch's Avatar
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    We don't know what was said via PM and I don't personally have experience with eating disorders but I will say that mental health is worth about 1000x more than your appearance so you should be most concerned by that. Setting yourself deadlines for something that take a long time to happen doesn't sound like a great idea. We see many people who are already light and want to diet further - it usually doesn't work because they don't have enough underlying muscle tissue so dieting should be completely off the agenda for you for numerous reasons IMO. Again, I hope this doesn't contradict anything that was said to you in private. My understanding is that it is the desire for control and continual thought about your weight that is what leads to the mental problems.
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  9. #9
    Common sense/moderation. gbullock32's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by numbaoneman View Post
    Update: nothing has gotten better. Got a little leaner but summer came and i gained more fat. have never struggled more. Leaving for college in 10 days at an all time low
    I am willing to bet you are not fat at all, we always judge ourselves far more than others will. It would be a good idea to seek help from therapy or counseling, the longer you keep up with the disordered behavior the harder it gets to stop, it's fine to need help, it's why those services exist; spent years of my life working on getting over my problems, finally did but it could have been much easier with help.
    Short cuts to success are often paved with lies.
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  10. #10
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    1650 is quite low for a male, especially if you're active. If you're on an extreme diet that makes you feel deprived, that will result in you wanting to have cheat days or abandon it altogether.

    Find a middle ground. Instead of eating 1650 one day and then binge eating 6000 calories on the weekend, try eating 2200-2400 calories every day. And then gradually tweak that by +200 or -200 each week as needed.
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  11. #11
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    College

    A week into college. Very hungry, havent binged so far bc idek how i would haha. And yes i am not obese, but have a lot of fat so am somewhat fat hahajehddhuebdbsjsie. College has sucked so far
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  12. #12
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SuffolkPunch View Post
    We don't know what was said via PM and I don't personally have experience with eating disorders but I will say that mental health is worth about 1000x more than your appearance so you should be most concerned by that. Setting yourself deadlines for something that take a long time to happen doesn't sound like a great idea. We see many people who are already light and want to diet further - it usually doesn't work because they don't have enough underlying muscle tissue so dieting should be completely off the agenda for you for numerous reasons IMO. Again, I hope this doesn't contradict anything that was said to you in private. My understanding is that it is the desire for control and continual thought about your weight that is what leads to the mental problems.

    I never sent anything in priv bc i didnt know how at the time
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  13. #13
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    College

    So jm in college now and have opportunities to go dt to bars and **** but out of cals 😔. Not tryna **** myself over w my cald but also sad im missing out on friends and mems 😔
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  14. #14
    Moderator SuffolkPunch's Avatar
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    Re-read the good advice given above and act on it. There is nothing else we can say since you seem to be ignoring it and doing what you know is wrong anyway. You should probably speak to a professional eating disorder counsellor.
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  15. #15
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SuffolkPunch View Post
    Re-read the good advice given above and act on it. There is nothing else we can say since you seem to be ignoring it and doing what you know is wrong anyway. You should probably speak to a professional eating disorder counsellor.

    Well im ab to be 18 in a month so at least now when I have these problems people will say "just man up and diet pussy like a man". Haha. How would u expect someone to j not wanna look better anf not act on it. Yesterday i went over on my cals a good bit so around maintenance and im ****ing pissed goddamn im a fat ****er. I like the gbullock guy i used to read all his posts when i was 14 ab teens cutting lol. Also how do i read my old poste
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  16. #16
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by gbullock32 View Post
    I am willing to bet you are not fat at all, we always judge ourselves far more than others will. It would be a good idea to seek help from therapy or counseling, the longer you keep up with the disordered behavior the harder it gets to stop, it's fine to need help, it's why those services exist; spent years of my life working on getting over my problems, finally did but it could have been much easier with help.

    What will "help do". Like i feel like i am doing the right thint by eating healthy so how r they gonna help me break bad habits? Only thing i need help w is discipline bc im a bitch
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  17. #17
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BS57 View Post
    In your 2019 post:


    Now you claim you want to be "155 for once in your life"?

    And stating you've now lost 40 lbs, that would have put you at 214.

    What sort of exercise/activities are you doing?

    For context a lot can change from 14 to 17 thats how i gained. I became a fat **** during covid lockdown. So yeah i topped off at 215 nov 2020
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  18. #18
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Yesterday i went over my cals and ate 2600 which is somewhat depressing but somewhat out of control. Idk why i am complaining ab estint 2600 when this summer i would eat 5k for days in a row lol
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  19. #19
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Idk if people can see this anymore but r ignoring. Im 18 now so its okay for me to suffer w food now so all good
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  20. #20
    Registered User numbaoneman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SuffolkPunch View Post
    Re-read the good advice given above and act on it. There is nothing else we can say since you seem to be ignoring it and doing what you know is wrong anyway. You should probably speak to a professional eating disorder counsellor.
    Idk if i am doinf the wrong thing or am just soft and cant discipline myself
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