Thread: Broke off 4 year relationship honestly just to be alone

If you end up wanting her back you'll know to set boundaries as far as doing what you can to have more time for yourself (but I understand it's hard w/ COVID).

A few simple rules are all you needed:
1. No living together. Period.
2. Sleep overs are limited to 1-2 days per week. Max.
3. You take at least 2-3 days per week to yourself. Where you don't see her in person.




I've a close friend that married a woman with a house and he kept his place. Married her under the conditions that he stays at his house 3 nights per week. Just to drink/chill/decompress. They've been together about 18 years now. Rock solid marriage.


Another close friend has his own bedroom in his house. Wife texts him before going in to bother him when he's there. Rock solid marriage of 15 years.


They set boundaries and let them know they need personal space.

Only time you should be okay to be with someone 24/7 is if she’s your soulmate
If it’s not that, you’ll have to find ways to tolerate her if you chose her for the genetics she would give to your kids

Originally Posted by guest89

I've a close friend that married a woman with a house and he kept his place. Married her under the conditions that he stays at his house 3 nights per week. Just to drink/chill/decompress. They've been together about 18 years now. Rock solid marriage.


Another close friend has his own bedroom in his house. Wife texts him before going in to bother him when he's there. Rock solid marriage of 15 years.


They set boundaries and let them know they need personal space.

This sounds great but having two places would cost a lot.

Plus if you had kids it'd get tricky.

Originally Posted by guest89

A few simple rules are all you needed:
1. No living together. Period.
2. Sleep overs are limited to 1-2 days per week. Max.
3. You take at least 2-3 days per week to yourself. Where you don't see her in person.




I've a close friend that married a woman with a house and he kept his place. Married her under the conditions that he stays at his house 3 nights per week. Just to drink/chill/decompress. They've been together about 18 years now. Rock solid marriage.


Another close friend has his own bedroom in his house. Wife texts him before going in to bother him when he's there. Rock solid marriage of 15 years.


They set boundaries and let them know they need personal space.

This sounds like a dream relationship for most men, but I wish all men the best in believing they're going to find a woman in their late 20s-early 30s who are going to be cool with that situation. It sure as hell didn't work for me lol. My recent ex of 2 years and I are no longer together because of this being exactly my ideal relationship scenario that I tried. Being fun cool, loving, best friends, loyal, her family loves me, 5 trips in 9 months you'd figure most women would be happy and satisfied. Lol nope....... "when are we moving in together. I'm not staying with you if you don't get your own place." All that right after a vacation to Destin which I paid everything for. Oh well.

you sound a lot like me op. i need 2-3 days a week to just hang by myself and not worry about other people's shiit. to date, most girls couldn't last, and i didn't mind it too much after a few days. there's no point in trying to force things. you found your formula for happiness. don't compromise it for anyone.

Originally Posted by the700level

This sounds like a fking dream

I feel like there are under 20 females on the planet who would actually agree to this

It really just depends on the man in question. Not the woman.

The dude with his own place married a good looking woman with a professional career that makes 280k per year. The other dude has a stay at home wife who doesn't work. Just a matter of being in charge of their relationships.

Originally Posted by skinnyfat88

This sounds great but having two places would cost a lot.

Plus if you had kids it'd get tricky.

You have to be successful in order for that sort of thing to work. My dad has 6 brothers and all 7 of them have ALWAYS had hunting/fishing camps/cabins in rural places 1h-4h drive from where we live.


It was always pretty much a given that 2-3 months out of the year during hunting season they'd be there every weekend. And occasionally a week at a time. And during summer months maybe 1-2 weekends a month fishing/riding 4-wheelers, etc. It helped that the wives were allowed to go during non-hunting season for the occasional weekend trip. But the other trips were 'for the guys'. That sort of thing is super common where I live (Louisiana). Nearly all females just accept if they are with a dude into the outdoors/hunting that's the way it goes.







I've already made it clear to my GF if we stay together long term I'm either buying a house-boat or a cabin/hunting camp somewhere. I need my space.

It really just makes a huge difference when you have your schit together. IE you own a house before you're with them. You've the money to do what you want and don't need to consult them or ask permission, etc.

Kind of in a similar situation. Girl is madly in love with me. She has 2 kids that are cool and I stay at her house half the week and my apt the other half. I can’t wait to get back home. She thinks I’m cheating on her but it is. Ironic ever since I’ve been In a relationship so many girls have wanted to sleep by with me. I just like being in my apt. It’s clean and quiet. I just feel more healthy and free too

Originally Posted by Immichaelski

Kind of in a similar situation. Girl is madly in love with me. She has 2 kids that are cool and I stay at her house half the week and my apt the other half. I can’t wait to get back home. She thinks I’m cheating on her.

No trust just because you have your own place?
It's doomed.

Hell my girlfriend just tested positive for corona and now is upset that I’m not at her house snuggling with her. I have to work and can’t take any chance. She is calling me selfish like wtf you are being selfish

Originally Posted by Immichaelski

Hell my girlfriend just tested positive for corona and now is upset that I’m not at her house snuggling with her. I have to work and can’t take any chance. She is calling me selfish like wtf you are being selfish

women lol

Originally Posted by Immichaelski

Hell my girlfriend just tested positive for corona and now is upset that I’m not at her house snuggling with her. I have to work and can’t take any chance. She is calling me selfish like wtf you are being selfish

The red flags are piling up bro.
Get out.

You made the right decision OP. She wasn't the one. Good job for not settling. You'll have regrets, but too few to mention. Better off being alone for awhile then being miserable for life.

Been married 24 years, work from home. My wife has NO concept of space. Always in my way in a 3900 sq ft house. I get it.

I enjoy the solitude when she goes out with her friends. Going to have a couple of scotches, start a fire, have a steak and watch TV.

Originally Posted by the700level

This sounds like a fking dream

I feel like there are under 20 females on the planet who would actually agree to this

Agree. Since both sexes are working today, its important to just relax and chill. All the women at work are chill, hot, good personalities but you can tell when they are stressed and you say to yourself man I would not want to go home to that....

Originally Posted by the700level

Bro I think about coming home to the same woman every night and cringe

But i also think about being 70 with no children or family and also cringe

Are we gonna make it?

whats the problem with being 70 and by yourself? think of all of the amazing days you had between now and then doing whatever the fuuck you want to. if you stay in shape, you'll be fine even past 70. i think about a life surrounded by my good friends and whoever i am banging at the time, and i feel that is a life well lived as long as you are not deceptive or deceitful to the women you get involved with about your ideal future. if you lie youre a douche. just be honest and up front and enjoy the ride.

Originally Posted by the700level

I don’t know how you do it bro

We must have very different personalities, I was DYING inside

I met the right one. She still likes me after all these years. But yesterday, I was SO bored I had to get out of the house. Even with college football on.

Originally Posted by guest89

A few simple rules are all you needed:
1. No living together. Period.
2. Sleep overs are limited to 1-2 days per week. Max.
3. You take at least 2-3 days per week to yourself. Where you don't see her in person.




I've a close friend that married a woman with a house and he kept his place. Married her under the conditions that he stays at his house 3 nights per week. Just to drink/chill/decompress. They've been together about 18 years now. Rock solid marriage.


Another close friend has his own bedroom in his house. Wife texts him before going in to bother him when he's there. Rock solid marriage of 15 years.


They set boundaries and let them know they need personal space.

My wife and I have slept in separate rooms pretty much from the get go. We tried sharing a bed in the beginning but I quickly realized it wasn't going to work as she sleeps like she's in a coma but I'm the opposite.

Just lol @ sharing a bed with another person. Most overrated thing ever. Thanks Jeff but no thanks.

Originally Posted by the700level

Bro I think about coming home to the same woman every night and cringe

But i also think about being 70 with no children or family and also cringe

Are we gonna make it?

I have this same dilemma in my head.

Some days i want that companionship you get from being in a long term relationship. Other days i want the new, and other days i want solitude.

Right now I'm enjoying single life overall and seeing a few different girls, but i do wonder if im gonna be 60+ spending my days as that old loner.

Originally Posted by LtGoose

Imagine not having a King sized bed. You sleep on a twin mattress? Fukin lolz

Bro my wife is a LOUD sleeper. She'd snore and gnash/grind her teeth all night. I'd give her a good elbow to her side and it would barely even phase her. I thought I was going to go insane so that's when i peaced out and got my own room.