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  1. #1
    Registered User FuarkBrahhhhh's Avatar
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    How long did it take you to get over your ex?

    First GF, been with her for 1 year and 6 months. It's been 5 months already and I can't ****ing get over her. Some days it's fine, but other days I feel like complete ****.
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  2. #2
    Registered User zackarykapowski's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by FuarkBrahhhhh View Post
    First GF, been with her for 1 year and 6 months. It's been 5 months already and I can't ****ing get over her. Some days it's fine, but other days I feel like complete ****.
    Have you been on NC and if so, how long?
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  3. #3
    No homo... GiveMeTheD's Avatar
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    How long is a piece of string... all depends on you, some people don't want to get over their ex.
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  4. #4
    Registered User zackarykapowski's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by GiveMeTheD View Post
    How long is a piece of string... all depends on you, some people don't want to get over their ex.
    I would imagine most people do want to get over it and if they could choose to just get over it, breakups wouldn't suck. Not the wisest words bro.
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  5. #5
    muscular Brahette-Goddess MeFromG's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by FuarkBrahhhhh View Post
    First GF, been with her for 1 year and 6 months. It's been 5 months already and I can't ****ing get over her. Some days it's fine, but other days I feel like complete ****.
    Longest time was 2,5 to 3 years. But after that it was all good and I was completely and permanently over it. 5 Months isn't a long time, it could easily take 5 more in addition. It's normal. Stay calm and ride it out for as long as it takes.
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  6. #6
    Top Tier Manlet Jasonw1178's Avatar
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    About 8 years on my first real long relationship. When I was finally over her, it was great. Moved on and am with someone that makes me look back and wonder what the hell I was thinking.
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  7. #7
    muscular Brahette-Goddess MeFromG's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Jasonw1178 View Post
    About 8 years on my first real long relationship. When I was finally over her, it was great. Moved on and am with someone that makes me look back and wonder what the hell I was thinking.
    8Years?! ... But good for you that you got over it finally! Plus enjoying a good rs now .
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  8. #8
    limp wristed little fairy bemine's Avatar
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    I forgot (srs), at some point you just stop thinking about her.
    ayyy lmao
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  9. #9
    Registered User icemancl1's Avatar
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    I never got over it and I don't think I ever will
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  10. #10
    Registered User WiseDisguise's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by icemancl1 View Post
    I never got over it and I don't think I ever will
    How often do you think about her, how long ago was the break up, and how long were you two together?
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  11. #11
    Registered User FanOfWok's Avatar
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    Relationship lasted about a year, and it took me ~6-7 months to move on and completely let it go.
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    A week for my first

    I dated my first ex despite the fact that I never liked her character. It was a dick move..

    A month or so for the second

    Dated chick for a few months, but it took me a month or so to forget her.
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  13. #13
    Registered User FuarkBrahhhhh's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by zackarykapowski View Post
    Have you been on NC and if so, how long?
    Been NC for 3 months now. Unfollowed her from Facebook, but sometimes a random post or picture of her comes up by a mutual friend and messes everything up. Not to mention some of my friends slipping up and telling me things about her (they're close to her too)
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  14. #14
    No homo... GiveMeTheD's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by zackarykapowski View Post
    I would imagine most people do want to get over it and if they could choose to just get over it, breakups wouldn't suck. Not the wisest words bro.
    Actually most people don't... most people convince themselves that their ex will come back, or that if they just did this right, or that right, it would be different. A lot of people stay in contact with their exes, stalk their facebook page etc. These are all conscious decisions people make to keep that person in their life.

    People don't let their exes completely go, because they don't think they can do better, "we were perfect" It tends to be low confidence people with limited options, who spend extended periods of time sad over a girl who dumped them. You think people would think about their exes if a 9/10 girl with great personality wanted to get with them, of course not.
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  15. #15
    Porn Connoisseur artDDP's Avatar
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    It took me a few months. I spent many of those months thinking I could win her back somehow.

    After about six months or so I became completely hardened. When I learned the girl I was seeing at that time had been cheating I just threw her out and moved on.
    "Above all, we must realize that no arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. It is a weapon our adversaries in today's world do not have."--Ronald Reagan

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  16. #16
    Registered User WiseDisguise's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by artDDP View Post
    When I learned the girl I was seeing at that time had been cheating I just threw her out and moved on.
    Somehow I think this is actually the best way to get over a girl IMO. Not necessarily to find out she's cheating, but just to get genuinely PISSED OFF every now and then. It clears the emotional blockages that have been holding you back from moving forward. Sometimes you just need to get mad and let it all go. Being a sad little whiny bi*ch will get you nowhere in the long run. If you can't learn to stick up for yourself and get pissed off every now and then when it's well deserved, no one will for you and instead people will walk all over you.
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  17. #17
    Registered User zackarykapowski's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by GiveMeTheD View Post
    Actually most people don't... most people convince themselves that their ex will come back, or that if they just did this right, or that right, it would be different. A lot of people stay in contact with their exes, stalk their facebook page etc. These are all conscious decisions people make to keep that person in their life.

    People don't let their exes completely go, because they don't think they can do better, "we were perfect" It tends to be low confidence people with limited options, who spend extended periods of time sad over a girl who dumped them. You think people would think about their exes if a 9/10 girl with great personality wanted to get with them, of course not.
    The people that do not want to move on are people who probably still care about the ex and actually loved them. You cannot help how you feel. I talked to girls before who looked much better than past exes and at that time I had no desire to be w them because I simply still cared about my ex. I just disagree with the way you view it. I'm sure that's the case in some instances, but not always.
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  18. #18
    Registered User TimeToGrowUp's Avatar
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    Seven months and counting on a 6 1/2 year relationship. First gf, lost Vs together, still only sexors. I went into hermit mode though so I'm sure putting myself out there, learning new things and having experiences will speed up the process. I'm not longer in love with her, I think I may just miss her company at this point.
    The anger phase kicking in last month helped a lot.

    Originally Posted by GiveMeTheD View Post
    Actually most people don't... most people convince themselves that their ex will come back, or that if they just did this right, or that right, it would be different. A lot of people stay in contact with their exes, stalk their facebook page etc. These are all conscious decisions people make to keep that person in their life.

    People don't let their exes completely go, because they don't think they can do better, "we were perfect" It tends to be low confidence people with limited options, who spend extended periods of time sad over a girl who dumped them. You think people would think about their exes if a 9/10 girl with great personality wanted to get with them, of course not.
    You're spot on. My ex isn't a HBB, she put on a fair amount of weight and I'm not even sure I found her attractive before she broke up with me. In fact, I used to imagine what it would be like if we broke up and I could be single for a bit! Reality was different though and also the fact it wasn't my choice. Then of course I wanted her, possibly ego, possibly fear I couldn't do as well.

    I think I'm ok looking and could have options if my confidence was higher. I think my low confidence will be a massive turn off for most girls - if a girl is checking me out I feel uncomfortable and can't maintain eye contact. The other issue is comparisons and, not being over her, wanting someone better looking who could make the ex feel worthless (pretty bitter).
    Last edited by TimeToGrowUp; 08-03-2014 at 03:23 AM.
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  19. #19
    Registered User zackarykapowski's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TimeToGrowUp View Post
    Seven months and counting on a 6 1/2 year relationship. First gf, lost Vs together, still only sexors. I went into hermit mode though so I'm sure putting myself out there, learning new things and having experiences will speed up the process. I'm not longer in love with her, I think I may just miss her company at this point.
    The anger phase kicking in last month helped a lot.
    Hang in there bro, it gets better. Fades more and more w time. The feels will come back less and less as time goes on. Can't help how you feel.
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  20. #20
    muscular Brahette-Goddess MeFromG's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TimeToGrowUp View Post
    ... I think I'm ok looking and could have options if my confidence was higher. I think my low confidence will be a massive turn off for most girls - if a girl is checking me out I feel uncomfortable and can't maintain eye contact. The other issue is comparisons and, not being over her, wanting someone better looking who could make the ex feel worthless (pretty bitter).
    As long as you think what she might feel or think when seeing you with a new partner, as long as this continues, you know clearly you are not over her and you're carrying heavy baggage around and even into your new relationship that doesn't deserve this stress and negativity on top of that.

    Apart from that though, try nevertheless to establish eye contact to women and even smile now and then back to them, even if it's not easy at this point. It might help you with your confidence and pain.
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  21. #21
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    It depends honestly. With my exwife we were together 10 years and we've been divorced not even a year and I don't think about her anymore. Even though our marriage hadn't been great the last year, the divorce was a waking nightmare for two months where thoughts of her kept intruding in my waking and sleeping life. Eventually I got over it. What helped me deal with it was going to counselors to talk, keeping a journal of what I was feeling (I can work through problems on paper better than in my head), and staying busy with other things, even though it's hard to stay motivated because you don't want to do anything.

    But, after that I dated this girl for about three months. She was the opposite of my ex-wife and for some reason I felt alive with her. That ended and when it did I really missed her for a while, and still think about her but not my ex wife. I think part of why that breakup hurt longer was because i didn't really understand what happened, and felt like there was potential there and it ended prematurely. I'm seeing someone else now, but I still think about this other girl. The journal is coming in handy because I can go back and see what my state of mind was in some of these other relationships and see patterns and make corrections now. The journal also helps keep me from idealizing people I've broken up with, such as that girl I dated who I missed.

    Would recommend journaling.
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    I'm an emotional cripple so we're talking, at most, 6 hours. Dead srs.
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    My first real love took me about 9 months to get over her. And it was only when I caught oneitis for another girl that I truly forgot about my ex.
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  24. #24
    русский brah CeBKa's Avatar
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    Work on yourself, meet new chicks. Your ex will become history very fast
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  25. #25
    Nah mean, jelly bean? FU3L's Avatar
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    A couple faps and all was well.
    The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.
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  26. #26
    Aggressive brah funnymaskxx's Avatar
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    Still working on it... its been 1 month on a 2 yr relationship.... the anger moments do help.. mornings are the worst.. i miss her so much on some days.. (specially weekends since i dont go to work), but i try to stay busy, been going out with friends and have met a couple of chicks, gotten a couple of numbers and stuff...
    I LOVED THAT girl with all my heart.. and i think after a month i've started to move on... the funny thing is... it kinda hurts me how im finally forgetting someone that was so important to me lol...
    but oh well... i can tell you the pain is way less now.. and im sure i will completely forget about her as time goes by...
    we gonna make it and PLEASE the guy that said his friends are updating him with chit or posting pics of her.. ask them not to update you about her... i did that and it helped me enormously. STAY NC!!!
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  27. #27
    Registered User Krimskrams's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by zackarykapowski View Post
    I would imagine most people do want to get over it and if they could choose to just get over it, breakups wouldn't suck. Not the wisest words bro.
    There are plenty of people who drown in their sorrow and do **** all for months on end.
    Those people, although claiming otherwise and probably even believing it, do not want to get over their ex.
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  28. #28
    Registered User TimeToGrowUp's Avatar
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    It's the denial phase. Until you can admit it is truly over and there will be no happy ever after you can't begin to move on.
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  29. #29
    Gonna Make It JawMirer's Avatar
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    First ex - 1 year relationship, good girl, I screwed it up, she dumped me - 2 years.
    Second ex - 2 year relationships, ten red flags or so (no cheating, even emotional, but too jealous and negative, found out she had many one night stands before me), I dumped her - 0 time.
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  30. #30
    Registered User PRico24's Avatar
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    idk man broke up in december after 3 years still not over it..
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